It Begins!

I have safely moved to Oregon! I wouldn't say I'm settled in my apartment, but I'm getting there. It feels good to be "home" again, I've missed my friends here a lot.

I started an internship with Sherwood United Methodist Church. They are an awesome group of people and so very brave to take on a student minister. I'll be preaching throughout the year and helping to plan worship, small groups, and whatever else they ask of me. It'll be so nice to work with Kirk again AND to have a chance to experience yet another side of church in action. My first sermon is actually on the 20th, and I'm meeting with our worship team to help plan the service on Wednesday. I love having the worship team meet weekly, it allows us to reflect on what needs changed, what works, and how the church can continue to grow. Plus, if I stick around, I get to listen to singing, which I love.

I start classes very soon. My first six week block of classes at NHTS are Greek and Church History. I'm not going to lie, I'm very nervous about Greek. I've never been awesome at languages. At least I already know the Greek alphabet! See, and everyone said being in a sorority wouldn't be useful.

I'm job hunting, which is a completely depressing process, but I have to just keep plugging away. While it would be nice if life was free, it turns out that's not so much true. It's one of those things that people keep saying will "work out." I'm sure they're right, but it doesn't make me stress less.

Leaving Idaho was hard, I miss my family, friends, and my youth group "kids" a lot, but I am just so ready to get it all started. Even the Greek.

Nuts and Bolts

I get asked about the "stuff" behind becoming a minister a lot, so I thought I'd give a quick overview of what, exactly, I'm doing right now. In the United Methodist Church, we have a long and slightly complicated candidacy process. I'm not the only one who gets to decide if this call is the right one for me, it's up to me, God, and various other people along they way. (But really, mostly God.)

So, anyone who is even thinking they are interested in ministry gets to read a fun little book called "The Christian as Minister" which is a nice overview of the duties, areas, and questions around ministry. Then, at some point, in some order, they write the district superintendent of their little area of the world that they are interested in pursuing candidacy. The DS gets very excited about this new little recruit and assigns a mentor to help guide the process.

Janine is my mentor and she's amazing. She's actually a deacon, which is different than an elder in many very confusing but important ways. (In the Methodist church both deacons AND elders are ordained clergy. The head pastor at a church is almost always going to be an elder.) I am on the "elder track" for now, which means I want to be a pastor in a little country church in the middle of Idaho. Anyway, Janine and I met all summer and talked through an impressive workbook as required by the various boards that require these things. She's an invaluable source of knowledge and wisdom. It is SO helpful to have a mentor, because there are a million questions that I needed help sorting out. I ranged from the major "wait, what am I thinking" to the practical "how much vacation time will I be getting?" In talking through everything that got me to this point and all my ideas for the future, I realized that I am heading in to the right call. She will continue to be my mentor for awhile (well, she'll be my unofficial mentor forever, of course) as I continue through this process.

In about a month, I meet with the District Council on Ministries, who will decide if I can continue on to be a certified candidate in ministry. They aren't actually deciding that in a month, I'm just having a preliminary interview. I also get to take a ridiculously long pysch profile to make sure I'm fit, or something. I'm not entirely clear. Sometime this spring they'll vote officially to make me a certified candidate.

Assuming that goes well, I will continue on with seminary. Once I've graduated, I meet with the Board of Ordained Ministry at the conference level. They ask me fun questions, I write essays, it all sounds very exciting. If I meet with their approval, I am then ordaaaai....

Nope, not fully ordained yet. If I get through all that with flying colors, I become a probationary elder. I will be commissioned to a church somewhere in the conference. I believe probationary ministry is about three years. After that I am finally, really, fully, ordained as an elder in full connection.

Lost yet? I usually am. It seems long and complicated, but it also ensures that the right people are heading to the right directions. And really, just because it is a church doesn't mean it is not a crazy bureaucracy too.

Statement of Call

I had to create an official statement of call for my "'file." I thought it would be good to shart it here, give a little more insight into why I feel called to ministry. Here it is:

I grew up in the Methodist church, and I attribute my strongly rooted faith to the community that surrounded me and helped guide my path. I was very active in our local youth program and I also served on District Youth Ministries Council. I always felt called to lead and to create strong communities around me. I fell away from my involvement while in college, and I deeply felt the loss of my foundation. I wasn’t sure where my place in the church was, but I knew that God was calling me back. While working as the Director of Youth Ministries for Caldwell United Methodist Church, I first began to recognize and acknowledge my call to ministry. Through my work with the youth, I’ve grown more deeply in faith and have realized that God is calling me to serve others through ordained ministry.

And a little excerpt from my graduate school admission essay:

Within a week of settling back home, I was called by three people about a youth leadership position at Caldwell United Methodist. I got the impression that God was done softly calling for my attention, he was yelling. My passion for God and for seeing Christ work in others’ lives was re-ignited. I fell in love with the ministry, but still didn’t feel at home in the church. It was not a church that was there for me or my peers.

In the past year, I have finally allowed myself to realize I am being called to ministry. There are young people desperately searching for a church that speaks to them, that brings truth and faith back into their lives, and there are churches that want to reach out to the next generation of Christians but don’t know how to bridge that gap. The Methodist Church is so afraid of change that it is stifling the work of the Spirit. It is maintaining discriminatory practices while boldly claiming “Open Hearts, Open Minds, Open Doors.” Church leaders officially vote on strong social issues, but those issues are not discussed in local congregations. I am called to ministry in the church, but not the church as it stands now. I am called to be part of a movement of young Christians who know that our church can be better. I am called to help inspire those who have lost the spark of Christ after 20 years of church meetings and endless petty debates. All of us suffer when a strong community is lost. We become stale and settled and safe. Christ never calls us to be just safe, so I want to reawaken the curious, tenacious questioner in all of them

The first step *check*

I heard, very unofficially, that I was accepted to graduate school two days before I left for church camp.  Very unofficially has never worked well for me, so I worked out an agreement with my mom.  She would email Taryn (a camp staffer and my favorite person on the earth) with good news, and Taryn would deliver that news to me.  It was on my mind all week, needing to know if this next step was going to happen, wondering if God's timeline for my life would ever match up with what I wanted.  I spoke about it a little on Thursday - the danger of really trusting God means that you don't always get what you want.  I had an evil little knot in my stomach by Friday afternoon.  What if I'd misunderstood the admissions counselor?  What if I'd been hearing God's call wrong all along?  What next?  I headed into Friday night campfire a little stressed.  It was a fun evening.  All the crazy skits and songs that you can pack into an hour being led by two fantastically energetic  high school seniors.  Half way through the night, Taryn tapped me on the shoulder.  "So, I got an email," she started.  Katey, another counselor, jumped up cheering, I burst into tears, and the campers didn't hear a thing.  I collected myself, told the counselors around me, told a few of "my kids" (the youth from Caldwell) and then the camp.  And what a perfect ending for the theme of the week!  I was so grateful for the opportunity to show that trusting in God does work out.  

So the official details:  I was accepted to Iliff School of Theology in Denver, CO.  I will be attending a consortium school, Northwest House of Theological Studies in Salem, OR for at least a year.  I am beyond excited to move back to Oregon, I've missed that state a whole lot.  I don't have a job, yet, but I'm just staying confident that it will come.

So now I feel like the journey is really beginning.  I've spent the last year officially discerning my call, but I was sure long before that.  Now it's on to school and life in ministry.  I would say I'm terrified, but I'm pretty sure that will come later.  Right now I'm just excited about moving forward and SO very grateful for everyone who has supported me while I try to figure it all out.  

I'm hoping to use this blog as a place to keep everyone updated on what I'm doing, reading, thinking, whatever.  My call is rooted in the community that has raised and loved me, so I am hoping to keep that community around me no matter where I go.